Who's Idea Was This?

    The good thing about waiting is that you have a lot of time to plan and prepare. But how do you prepare for the unknown? In a time of complete uncertainty, what do you do? What is God's purpose here? What do I need to do? I find myself with all this time to think and my thoughts are swirling at high speeds inside my head. Will I be able to do this? Do I have what it takes? Is my family ready for this? Will my children understand the process? Am I ready for my heart to be broken? Am I strong enough? Who's idea was this? The questions come flying at me and for a brief moment fear begins to fill my mind.  But I remember a verse  . . . "Take captive every thought." 
     I whisper up a prayer and in my quiet time I hear Him say, "I have called you here and I am with you. I have given you everything you need. Do not fear, simply trust me!" You see, my heart is all in. Foster care and adoption is something that keeps me up at night and it is what I think about in the morning. You will find me crying and blubbering at Meet the Robinsons and sobbing during the news when I hear stories of abandoned or mistreated children. But tears are not enough, I am called to act.
     I know it will be hard and I know my heart will be broken. I know at times I will experience feelings of anger, frustration, and helplessness. In those times, please encourage me. I realize that by opening up our home to a child, I am inviting brokenness to come in too. The brokenness and tragedy that will bring them to our door, will become ours as well.  But Jesus is not asking me to do something that He has not already done. We are all broken and in need of a savior.  Jesus went to the broken and hurting on purpose. He took our brokenness on Himself and in return offered us hope and wholeness; peace and freedom. He experienced pain and suffering so we could be whole. This was HIS idea! Jesus knew in advance the pain and isolation He would feel and yet He still chose to walk in obedience. I was worth His pain. He loves me that much. So if I am able to offer love, stability, peace, and hope even for a short time, I am willing. No matter matter how much it hurts, I will walk in obedience because every child is worth the pain.
    This is the calling that Jesus has put on my heart! (Our hearts.)   What is God calling you to? Are you brave enough to ask Him and braver still to follow through? Whatever it is, know this . . . His ways are good and He has great ideas! He will give you what you need to do what He asks of you! With Him, you are strong enough.  The questions, doubts and fears are not from God. It is the enemy, seeking to kill, steal and destroy. I will not believe those lies. I will trust the One who has called me and I will follow in His steps, no matter how hard it is or how much it hurts.

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​"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those
whose spirits are crushed."
Psalm 34:18

​"For the God who calls you is faithful, and He can be trusted to make it so."
1 Thessalonians 5:24

I found this beautiful letter on my bed the other day. It was written by my daughter to our foster child. It brought tears of joy to see that God was also working on the heart of my child. I am not afraid of how this journey will affect my children. Though I want to shelter and protect them from pain, I can not shelter them from the brokenness that is in the world. Rather, I pray and put them in Jesus' hands knowing that He has a plan for them and wants them to also reach out to the hurting and broken. We are in this together!